People say this because Ariel trades her voice for legs, which I think people misinterpret as Ariel trading her voice for a guy (Eric). People then see then message of The Little Mermaid to be "change yourself for a guy!" I never saw it that way as a child and I still don't know. I think Ariel is a strong female character, and pretty darn feminist too.
Ariel is a free-spirited, determined, teenage mer-girl who is obsessed with the human world. As much as she loves her father, she is ultimately against him (and the patriarchy since he is the king) because he is holding her down. She wanted to visit the human world and know more about it for a long time before she saw and saved Eric. She has an entire song about it. I think Eric was just icing on the cake for her. He was also the very first human she'd up close. Right before she goes to see Ursula, her father has just destroyed all of her human treasures because of her obsession with the human word and her "love" for Eric. She upset, all her human treasures are gone, as well as she wants to visit the human world more than anything, so she would probably have traded anything to be human. Her trading her voice for legs was not because of her "love" of Eric alone, but of her love of the human world, and her determination.
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